Ridding your life of negativity

Ever heard the statement "garbage in - garbage out" ? I never knew what it meant until I was an adult and began to realize that not everyone I hung around with was a positive person. And I also realized that I enjoyed the positive people much more than the ones who sucked the life out of me with their negativity.



"Are people excited when you walk into a room, or excited when you leave?"



I don't think any of us want to be the person that excites people when we leave the room. We want to interact with people, make new friends, feel good about the conversations we've had and feel like we made an impression on people. How dreadful that it might be the wrong impression!



To be a positive person who gives energy to others it takes some work. Lot's of us are somewhat positive every day, but without the proper "prepping" for our day it can only take a few hours and things seem to be heading down a negative path. The coffee pot ran over, your toast burned, the kids won't get up, etc. etc. It's important to take a little time to "prep" your day with affirmations of what you want the day to be or some positive visualization.

But let's talk first about surrounding yourself with positive people and places and habits that can fuel your positive attitude. I was taught years ago to make a list of the top 20 people in your life. They can be family members, co-workers, or friends and acquaintances. Now draw a line down the middle of that piece of paper and on the left put a "+" sign and on the right column put a "-" sign. Now, don't think too much, just go down your list and put a check mark in the column that applies to that person. Do they give you energy? Are they always encouraging? Do they make you smile? Or are they life suckers, always drama, never happy. These are the kind of people that when you ask them "how are you?" they tell you all about some problem they have. Imagine if you could always hang out with the ones who fill you up? How awesome would your day be? The idea is that at some point you need to adjust your list so that your top 20 ARE those positive people! Start cutting out the negative ones. They will suck the life right out of you, and pretty soon you won't have much to give, to your spouse, your kids or your life.

Next considering not going to places that don't make you feel happy. Seems simple right? But I know someone who frequents the same restaurant and does nothing but complain about the service always being bad. Why would you do that to yourself?!! If there is a coffee shop that has friendly Batista's and they know you by name and you always leave with a smile.... go there! If your single friend always wants to drag you along to a club and you are there thinking what am I doing here, this place doesn't make me feel good, then don't go. Don't waste your energy. It's way to precious!! Ever notice that the people with the most drama in their life continually are always the most tired? It all connects.

And last but not least, ditch the bad habits of your life. They can be sucking the energy out of you also! If you continually do something that doesn't make you feel good it's time to break the habit. Maybe it's overeating or not budgeting etc. Realize that it takes 21 days to form a habit and I think if you are trying to change one and replace it with a new one, it can take even longer. But set a goal to take the next 21 days and put your new goal in front of you every day and go about changing it! You'll be amazed at the energy that comes from you when you do things you like to be doing and stop doing the things that take up too much energy.

A word of caution: some of these things are very close. The most negative person in your life might just be your spouse or your mother, you will have to find a way to deal with that and hopefully move in a new direction with them. Some of the places that are most negative might just be where you work! And some of the habits, like smoking or drinking too much, you might have to find some extra help with to change that pattern, but it will be worth it!