Creating a Healthy Spending Habit

Some of you might think...what is a spending habit and how do I make it healthy? Sounds a little odd, but it is necessary.
A spending habit is a plan on how and when you will spend your money, kind of like a budget but that is a whole other topic. This is more a plan of what type of things you will spend discretionary income on and when its okay to make purchases to stay in line with your financial plan (and your dreams).

This is a topic often overlooked. Most people set a budget and try to stick to it...or not and never really think about a plan for the rest of their spending. It was a new idea to me too at one point but now I love it. It keeps me on track with my goals and gives me a real sense of satisfaction when I do spend.

Not counting your bills, the monthly expenses that you have and pay to "keep the lights on" etc., think about what other money you spend. How many times do you eat out? Is that accounted for in your budget? When do you go clothes shopping, or do you just shop when the urge strikes you? If you are the later you may really think about this because the people who shop when the urge hits them are usually the ones who spend more than they wanted to or had budgeted. When you walk into Target do you only come out with what you went in for? Or is it a $100 later and a cart full of things that weren't on the list?

I relate spending to eating often because in a way they are both things people struggle with keeping in line and they are both things we have to do. You can't NOT eat and you can't NOT ever make a purchase. In my over spending days, I could spend $100 extra dollars at the grocery store, just because I was there and it was a reason to shop. I'd buy makeup, hair and body products even socks, because it fulfilled my shopping need.

So what I'm trying to get you to think about is "do you really need it?" or are you just buying it because it's there or it's on sale.

I have so much spending money I take out per week. This money is for extras that aren't in the budget. Clothes shopping, makeup (not the necessary kind, the fun stuff) lunch out with a friend etc. At the beginning of the week I look at what I have coming up that week, do I have a lunch scheduled? If so I set aside approx. how much I'll need for that and then the rest is my spending money. If I want to really shop and not look at price tags then I know I need to save as much of my spending money as possible for a few weeks and then when I go I have no guilt, no regret I just shop and buy what I want. So much more rewarding than just sticking it on a credit card and then regretting later when the bill comes. But the point is I plan out what that money will be used for. Before I'd spend and then about the time my money was gone, I'd find or think about what it was I really wanted and it would be too late. I'd be out of money.

If you like to eat out, plan how many times this month or pay period you would like to do that. Then stick to it. Use only the money you had planned on using for those meals and if you splurge on the first one, then maybe you don't get to go out to eat the next week. But make yourself accountable. Lack of planning does not count. If you are getting home a little late from work that is not a reason to eat out. The meal for that night should have been planned and possibly prepped and then you can stay on track.

My husband and I have a plan that neither of us can be out and spend more than $100 without first talking about it. This does not mean you have to answer to someone, it's just accountability. He is my voice of reason and I am his. If he is at Costco picking up a few things and really wants that flat screen TV instead of loading it up, he'd call and I'd say we have blank, blank and blank we decided we would buy first before we even think about the TV, because it's not needed. If I find a dynamite pair of pumps but they are over $100 then he might tell me of the new curtains I want for our bedroom that we talked about being our next purchase. There are those occasions when I really want something and it's a good deal etc. or he does and we say okay, go ahead and get it and we'll just put "x" further down on the list of our things we want to do.

This list I talk about is our priority list of things we want. No limits just sit down together and list it all out. A new front door, new carpeting, a new suit, or parts for his Harley. We agree to the priority of these things and that they are our most wanted items. Then when one of us is thinking of an impulse buy, we remind each other of our list and whatever is the top priority item on the list at that time.

Not only does this keep us on track financially it makes us feel like we are in this together and working toward a common goal. And when I know we have each others backs and we are working together those pumps don't look that attractive anymore.

1. Make your priority list
2. Decide how much spending money you need and what is coming up in the week it will need to be spent on.
3. Stick to the plan!!!! I promise the self esteem you'll get by doing it far outweighs the instant gratification of an impulse buy.

Now it's like a game to me, I know the big retailers are banking on me making impulse buys while I'm there and I'm out to beat them and only get what's on my list and end up the rich one in the end. After all my goal is not to make them financially successful it's to make ME and my FAMILY financially successful!

Ridding your life of negativity

Ever heard the statement "garbage in - garbage out" ? I never knew what it meant until I was an adult and began to realize that not everyone I hung around with was a positive person. And I also realized that I enjoyed the positive people much more than the ones who sucked the life out of me with their negativity.



"Are people excited when you walk into a room, or excited when you leave?"



I don't think any of us want to be the person that excites people when we leave the room. We want to interact with people, make new friends, feel good about the conversations we've had and feel like we made an impression on people. How dreadful that it might be the wrong impression!



To be a positive person who gives energy to others it takes some work. Lot's of us are somewhat positive every day, but without the proper "prepping" for our day it can only take a few hours and things seem to be heading down a negative path. The coffee pot ran over, your toast burned, the kids won't get up, etc. etc. It's important to take a little time to "prep" your day with affirmations of what you want the day to be or some positive visualization.

But let's talk first about surrounding yourself with positive people and places and habits that can fuel your positive attitude. I was taught years ago to make a list of the top 20 people in your life. They can be family members, co-workers, or friends and acquaintances. Now draw a line down the middle of that piece of paper and on the left put a "+" sign and on the right column put a "-" sign. Now, don't think too much, just go down your list and put a check mark in the column that applies to that person. Do they give you energy? Are they always encouraging? Do they make you smile? Or are they life suckers, always drama, never happy. These are the kind of people that when you ask them "how are you?" they tell you all about some problem they have. Imagine if you could always hang out with the ones who fill you up? How awesome would your day be? The idea is that at some point you need to adjust your list so that your top 20 ARE those positive people! Start cutting out the negative ones. They will suck the life right out of you, and pretty soon you won't have much to give, to your spouse, your kids or your life.

Next considering not going to places that don't make you feel happy. Seems simple right? But I know someone who frequents the same restaurant and does nothing but complain about the service always being bad. Why would you do that to yourself?!! If there is a coffee shop that has friendly Batista's and they know you by name and you always leave with a smile.... go there! If your single friend always wants to drag you along to a club and you are there thinking what am I doing here, this place doesn't make me feel good, then don't go. Don't waste your energy. It's way to precious!! Ever notice that the people with the most drama in their life continually are always the most tired? It all connects.

And last but not least, ditch the bad habits of your life. They can be sucking the energy out of you also! If you continually do something that doesn't make you feel good it's time to break the habit. Maybe it's overeating or not budgeting etc. Realize that it takes 21 days to form a habit and I think if you are trying to change one and replace it with a new one, it can take even longer. But set a goal to take the next 21 days and put your new goal in front of you every day and go about changing it! You'll be amazed at the energy that comes from you when you do things you like to be doing and stop doing the things that take up too much energy.

A word of caution: some of these things are very close. The most negative person in your life might just be your spouse or your mother, you will have to find a way to deal with that and hopefully move in a new direction with them. Some of the places that are most negative might just be where you work! And some of the habits, like smoking or drinking too much, you might have to find some extra help with to change that pattern, but it will be worth it!