Sometimes YOU have to do the uplifting!

It is a fact that there are many people out there who don't have a good cheerleader. That person in their corner who is there telling them that they can do it! Encouraging them and building them up with positive words and actions.  Someone who has got their back! Someone who will wipe away the tears. Someone they can lean on when times get hard. 

Who cheers you on?  In your daily quest to become the very best you can possibly be, is there someone walking along side you, encouraging you and lifting you up?

Or do you find that sometimes when you share your dreams you run up against naysayers and people who want to tell you how you SHOULD do it or how your doing it wrong. Or sometimes they just poo poo your dreams and make you feel like you'll never be able to pull that off and "what makes you think...". Sometimes they are even the people who try to discourage you and tell you "you're just not skilled in that way" or "not lucky enough" or maybe just "not cut out for it". 

This happens to people trying to achieve all sorts of things.  One thing that I see a lot is someone who is on a quest to lose weight or get in shape and the people closest to them are sabotaging them at every step of the way, by tempting them with the very things they are trying to cut out or stay away from. Telling them "oh, you can have just one", or "it won't hurt you" and giving them every excuse and reason NOT to follow their plan.  Sometimes it is your spouse or children or other family and you live in the same house with them so it's just not an option to stay away from them.  For many it's co-workers with a candy bowl on their desk, tempting you at every pass by it. But it can happen in many areas of life.

It can be very frustrating and exhausting to deal with. 

The first thing I tell clients is to make a list of the positive and negative people in their lives.  Who gives you energy and who sucks the life out of you?  You become like the 5 people you hang around the most.  So if you live with one or two of them the other 3 better be super energy givers!  We all need to take a look at this list and begin to spend less time with the energy suckers and the negative people who cause us to use more and more of our own energy just to keep ourselves positive. " In order for your cup to runneth over and be able to give to others you have to keep your cup full first!" - Iyanla Vanzant 
I have to be in a good place in order to help others and if I am constantly fighting to stay positive myself then it doesn't balance out very well. I will be the one who is depleted.  We are great at making sure everyone else's needs are met, instead of doing the opposite and making sure that we are okay first, so that we have more to give.  It's a pattern we need to break!

So if you find that you don't have enough cheerleaders... find some more!  Surround yourself with positive people who are headed in a similar direction as you, or are where you want to be and get involved with them.  Form relationships with those people and you'll find that what you put into it comes back ten fold!

Next, and I think most importantly is BE YOUR OWN BEST CHEERLEADER!!  Uplift yourself everyday.  Get your systems in place and use them.  Build your self confidence by speaking the truth and doing what you say your going to do so that you can feel good about you.  Use affirmations and speak to yourself with total loving kindness!  Empower yourself by believing in you even when someone else doesn't.  You create this by envisioning it everyday.  Visualize yourself at your very, very best!  Being who you want to be, having what you want to have, feeling the way you want to feel and living the life you want to live.  Do it right after rising in the morning and the last 10 min. before you fall asleep at night. Put your subconscious mind to work on those things by making them your last thoughts. You have to get so clear on what you want that no one can push you off course.  It doesn't matter if someone else can do it better, more accurate and articulate it better.  You are enough!  You are right were you are suppose to be in your journey.  God has a plan and he is using you through it.  Sometimes we hold ourselves back because we can't be perfect yet?  No one expects you to be and the journey of getting better every day is the most beautiful part!  Live your journey! Believe in your dreams and feed your mind daily with lots of good loving self talk, like you are in the biggest love affair ever..... with YOU!  It's not ego unless you're out telling everyone else how great you think you are. But we truly speak the worst to ourselves on a daily basis and don't stop to think about what all the bad things you say about yourself are doing to tear you down.  Build yourself up... Uplift You! 

Don't be discouraged if you feel like there is no one there to uplift you.  Start forming your group of uplifting people and spending more time around them.  Get with other dreamers and soon the naysayers won't have as much effect on you.  Get your systems in place that help motivate you. By visualization, affirmations and good self talk.  There are a ton of ideas out there.  Some watch motivational videos or read motivational quotes, but find those things that evoke positive energy in you and use them on a daily basis to get yourself "right" and feeling positive and on the right path.
I know someone who's main motivation comes from "proving them all wrong" and it works for her.  Figure out what works for you.  Another person envisions her co-workers blowing up like a balloon when they are trying to get her to eat something she doesn't want to. Soon she found that they learned they couldn't penetrate her resolve and they quit asking her to eat cake, cookies and other treats.  Only you know your motivation and know what causes the emotion in you that then makes you feel lifted up.  Find it and use it for your good.


Kimberly Pfauth
Certified Life Coach / Motivational Speaker
Firestone CO
kimberspeaks@gmail.com

Motivation...

"Let motivation be the by product of your life, not the foundation to build upon." -John Maxwell




I get emails all the time from people asking me how I stay motivated and I'm always stumped because I don't know how to explain it and I usually dive into some rant about setting a goal and working toward it with small goals to get me there etc. And as much as that is true, the real truth is I just set my schedule and I am dedicated to it and it's become a habit and THAT motivates me!



What John Maxwell is talking about is the fact that if you wait to be motivated to do something it just might not happen, but if you do what you should do it usually is followed by motivation. I think too often we are waiting for that light bulb moment the "ah ha!" We're thinking motivation is suppose to be magical and mystical and we get jealous of the fact that some people seem to" have it" and we want it too! That's like saying the girl on the cover of Oxygen is so lucky because she has a body like that! LOL When really we all know "luck" has nothing to do with it. It's hard work and dedication to get there. It's sacrificing and being determined to meet our goals. It is doing it even when we don't feel like doing it. In the words of Nike... JUST DO IT!



When we begin to get dedicated and just do the things we are suppose to be doing, whether it is eating clean and following our workout schedule or one more set. Maybe it's work related and we know we have to make so many calls to set the next appointment and just by putting in the work the results begin to come. But when we don't do what we know we are suppose to do, then sure enough, the results don't come and we find ourselves more and more unmotivated.



I do find that when I put in the work, like getting out of bed on the first alarm at 5:00 a.m. and hitting the gym, running my HIIT on the days I am suppose to and do those last sets when it's the toughest, I begin to feel like something is happening. I feel good about myself and I start seeing results and it makes it a little bit easier to get up (Motivation). When I eat clean and plan my meals and snacks and cook ahead of time so I have everything I need to stay on my plan, sure enough, the scale moves and then I get even more excited to stick to it (Motivation). And when I make all my calls and put in the time that I need to, to set appointments, then I have enough work and I'm making good money and I feel good about my success and it makes rejection seem like just another "next!" (Motivation).



So the key is to remember this the next time I'm feeling like I've lost my mojo or I'm in a slump. All I really need to do is start DOING and the motivation to do will follow. It's like saying I want to make a million dollars and then sitting back and waiting for it to fall in my lap... it just doesn't happen that way. So I say motivation doesn't come without hard work. Sure you need to set a plan and a goal and work toward it and there are a million ways to pump yourself up but the best way is to just do it and I guarantee that you will feel better for having done it!



So let the motivation be the by product of your doing the work and I hope you have a VERY Motivated week!